Why some people seem to never fail?

When was the last time you failed at work?

Some people will answer right away having fresh in mind the last time they missed a deadline, did something wrong in a presentation or couldn’t deliver a report. No matter how much experience and knowledge we have, some of the things we do won’t have the desired outcome.

Some people instead will not be able to answer this question. This is not because they never fail, but because they almost don’t have this word in their vocabulary. They approach failure in a different way and somehow they manage to concentrate on the next thing they want or need to do. These are usually the people we consider successful.

So, coming back to the first question: Why some people seem to never fail?

One of the reasons is because they have a different attitude towards failure.  

Failure is normal and we can control it

Failure is most of the times a matter of expectations and perspective. It’s up to us to consider a setback the end of the world or a phase in reaching what we want.

Instead of being frustrated about having failed, a much more constructive approach is to say: '' I couldn't succeed this time. What could I do better next time?''

Take responsibility

Blaming others will not help. This will position us in the role of the victim from which is hard to get out. As we can't control what others think or do, the only attitude that will bring us forward is to take responsibility for what happened and figure out what WE should've done differently.

Learn the lessons

It is vital that we don’t repeat the same mistakes especially in a professional context. This can only be done when we are ready to find out the factors that led to our inability to complete a project or assignment properly.

Accept the failure and ask for help if necessary

Not being successful in a situation will not take anything from what we are as a person. This is what most people don't understand and therefore will try to hide or never accept their mistakes. Overcoming our setbacks instead will make us grow and add value to our professional and personal experience.

Asking for help from our team members is a matter of trust. We need to trust that they will be willing to help. At the same time asking for their help will consolidate the trust within the team.  

Move on

The time spent thinking at our failure after realizing what we could have done differently, is a wasted time.

All the compassion of our colleagues and friends, all the bad feelings and frustrations that we have will not actually make us get out of the situation. What will bring us forward is a positive attitude and the confidence that the experience gained will make us ready for the new challenges.

''I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.'' Thomas A. Edison

The road to our goals and the people along the way

A few years ago I have heard "The story of the tiny frog" and I always think of it when it comes to achieving goals. Here is the story:

The Story Of The Tiny Frog

There once was a bunch of tiny frogs who got together to arrange a competition to reach to the top of the highest tower in town.
As the date for the competition was announced, the news spread everywhere and crowd in large numbers gathered around the tower to see this interesting competition and cheer on the contestants. The crowd did not really believe any of these little frogs were going to make it to the top of the tower. Yet they were curious…The competition began, the frogs quickly started to ascend and the crowd cheered!
As a few moments passed, someone from the crowd shouted, "Not a chance that they will succeed! The tower is too high!"
Another spectator said, "Yes, they will never make it to the top. It's way too difficult!"

As the competition continued, some of the tiny frogs began collapsing. One by one… tired… exhausted… But the race continued… as those who still had the fight left, passionately continued to climb higher and higher…
In the excitement and anxiety  the crowd continued to yell, "It is too difficult. No one will make it!"

More tiny frogs got tired and gave up. They all continued to give up one by one, until there was only ONE little frog left in the competition who continued to climb higher and higher and higher…
This one wouldn’t give up!
This one tiny frog who, after a big effort was the only one who reached the top! This little soul was the winner! He made it! He got the glory!

Naturally, everyone wanted to know how this one tiny frog managed to pull it off when every other contestant gave up. Everybody wanted to know how this tiny frog had found the strength to reach this goal that everyone else thought it was impossible. So, they asked questions.

It turned out that the winner was deaf.

The Moral Of The Story: Be deaf when people tell you that you can not fulfill your dreams and goals.  

I would say it´s better to stay away from these people or at least donˋt share your plans or goals with them.

Even if they actually have good  intentions and they donˋt want us to get hurt or demotivated if we donˋt reach our goals, their negative attitude might make us start doubting our own abilities and eventually give up our goals or lower our target.

On the other hand, those people who have a positive attitude, even if they are thinking our goals are too high they will not discourage us. Instead they will share their relevant experience, try and help us make a plan, give us ideas on where to get more information or how to reach our target and even boost our self confidence. These people know that reaching the goal is not the most important thing, but what you learn on the way. They are the ones who will help us grow and who we will always remember with gratitude.

What kind of people do you have around?

How many of them encourage you achieve what you want and are supportive?

How do you handle the ones who under the excuse of being realistic, are telling you how hard it will be for you to get what you want and that it would be better to have lower expectations and goals?  

And how about you? Are you telling others: "You will never make it to the top. It's way too difficult!"?